All week ABC news has been running stories on various angles of baby boomer retirement. An estimated 10,000 baby boomers retire every day now that the frontrunners have turned 65. One segment that really intrigued me was about couples living apart after retirement.
Boomer women are more likely than previous generations to pursue their own path in retirement even if their spouse is on a different one.
Why Separate Retirements?
Two couples were featured and both of them only live apart sometimes. One woman realized post-retirement that their dream retirement home in Maine wasn’t so dreamy in the winter. The other couple are apart when the wife leaves for volunteer trips that can last several weeks.
The fact is that two people who love each other and have shared decades together may want different things out of retirement. Should one sacrifice for the other? No, but I think there is another solution.
I don’t understand why the husband in the first story doesn’t join his wife in Cambridge during the winter. They could both live in two separate communities throughout the year. However, it seems like it works for them. I wouldn’t even consider the second couple as living apart. She is taking trips that he doesn’t want to go on.
My husband and I didn’t even talk about where to live or what to do in retirement when we courted. Only as we approached our mid-life years, did the discussion start happening. We agree on where to live and want to be together.
However, I often take non-business trips without him. My sisters and mom go on girls trips and and once was gone for two weeks. I could see me going on off volunteer trips for weeks and him staying home. He’s just more of a homebody than me.
The Ideal Solution
For me, marriage means being together but it also means giving your spouse the freedom to pursue their own hobbies, dreams and goals (even if it means blogging about invoice discounting). I know we appreciate each other even more after these trips apart.
I love sharing my experiences with Mr. Boomer as well. So, it’s fine to spend time apart but just not too long! What do you think about spending time apart in retirement?